An A - Z
of London

Capital Numbers

An alphabetical guide
to London


A is for 'orses
B is for Bow Bells
C is for 21st Century
D is for Dome
E is for Escalator
F is for Fog
G is for GLC
H is for History
I is for Information
J is for Jellied Eels
K is for Keeping Safe
L is for London Transport
M is for Money
N is for Nightbus
01 for London
P is for Plague
Q is for Queen
R is for Red Route
S is for Streets of London
T is for Thames
U is for Underground
V is for Villages
W is for WestEnders
X is for Charing X
Y is a Year in London
Z is for Zoo

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I

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I is for Information


TV: All media jobs are based in London, because in the media nowhere outside London is worth reporting on. Try to spot the difference between the TV national news and the London regional news, except that the heart-warming piece about Yorkshire ducks has been replaced by a Hackney stabbing.


Newspapers: Broadsheet newspapers are an endangered species in London, as it’s impossible to open one fully on a rush-hour bus or tube. Instead the tabloid is king, most especially ‘Metro’, the free paper picked up from piles at stations every morning and left behind in piles on trains minutes later.


Radio: Across most of the country there are five national BBC stations, a local BBC station aimed at the over 90s, and an ‘independent’ franchise who still think that S Club 7 is cutting-edge programming. In London there are so many stations aimed at cultural or musical minorities that each has a maximum target audience of about ten. In addition there are as many pirate stations as there are tower block rooftops, each broadcasting to a less-than-massive massive, and the cause of crackly interference right across the VHF waveband. Or else maybe that’s what the music’s supposed to sound like?


Adverts: Piccadilly Circus has some of the most famous billboards in the world, but across London adverts are everywhere. They’re on huge posters beside every road, they’re about all you can read on the tube, and it’s hard to walk down any street without someone thrusting some litter into your hand. And by the way, has anybody you know ever been to the ‘Golf Sale’? Thought not. Just wondered.